


Angel With A Shotgun

by sandean_cas



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Universe, Castiel & Sam Winchester Friendship, Castiel Does Not Get The References (Supernatural), Castiel Does Not Understand Humans (Supernatural), Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Castiel and Dean Winchester Have a Profound Bond, Castiel and Dean Winchester Need to Use Their Words, Castiel and Dean Winchester in Love, Castiel in the Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Complete, Cute, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Dean Winchester Loves Chick-Flicks, Dean's Top 13 Zepp Traxx Mixtape, Feels, Fluff, Friendship, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Oblivious Castiel/Dean Winchester, Oblivious Dean Winchester, Oblivious Sam Winchester, Sam Winchester Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester, Song: Angel With A Shotgun, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2021-02-18 12:07:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21610648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandean_cas/pseuds/sandean_cas
Summary: “I – I have a matter of grace importance to discuss with you.”“What has the universe thrown at us now?” he lets out a tired sigh.Cass makes a disgruntled noise, “This is… of a more personal nature Dean.”“There – there has been some confusion lately.” He states, shifting uneasily. “And all sources of information tell me that it’s – one thing. But you always tell me the contrary.”Oh shit… had Cass figured out that ketchup isn’t actually a vegetable?“I um, talked to Sam. He wasn’t much help. He seemed more panicked than me actually.”“What did you talk about?” Dean asks.“About what it means to be brothers.” He admits shakily. Dean feels his heart drop. He knows exactly where this conversation is headed. Cass had finally realised that something about their relationship is different to the one he has with Sam. And now he’s here to call Dean out on the discrepancies – the large disparities between their relationships.“Cass – I can explain –”ORCass talks to Sam about the difference between brotherly feelings and romantic feelings and makes a mix-tape ... of sorts.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 12
Kudos: 189





	Angel With A Shotgun

“Dean.” He glances up from his movie, keeping one eye on the screen as his hands pat the bed in search of the remote.

He pauses it and flips onto his back, raising his eyebrows as he takes in Castiel’s appearance.

“Sup Cass?”

“The ceiling.” He replies with a small frown. “Or were you referring to the sky?”

He laughs, “You’re better than any comedian out there buddy, never let anyone tell you anything different.”

“Dean.” He tries again, “I – I have a matter of grace importance to discuss with you.”

That wipes the mirth off his face.

“What has the universe thrown at us now?” he lets out a tired sigh.

Cass makes a disgruntled noise, “This is… of a more personal nature Dean.”

“Lay it on me.” his mind is already drifting to all the possible scenarios… to be honest, some are worrying him.

“There – there has been some confusion lately.” He states, shifting uneasily. “And all sources of information tell me that it’s – one thing. But you always tell me the contrary.”

Oh shit… had Cass figured out that ketchup isn’t actually a vegetable?

“I um, talked to Sam.” Cass admits. Dean feels a little bitter that Sam had been his first choice, but it gets it. Sam is the smarter of the two, it makes sense that Cass would go to him when he’s confused; especially when Dean is the one who confused him. “He wasn’t much help. He seemed more panicked than me actually.”

“What did you talk about?”

“About what it means to be brothers.” He admits shakily. Dean feels his heart drop. He knows exactly where this conversation is headed. Cass had finally realised that something about their relationship is different to the one he has with Sam. And now he’s here to call Dean out on the discrepancies – the large disparities between their relationships.

“Cass – I can explain –”

Cass shakes his head, “Let me talk first.”

“Okay.” Dean whispers.

“Sam tells me that you two talk a lot.” Cass’ voice is tentative and unsure and it scares the hell out of Dean who is just waiting for the shoe to drop. “He says that it wasn’t always that way. And sometimes he wants to punch you when you say something insensitive or cruel. He um, says that he’s watched over you on the nights that you were sick and that you woke up and threw a fit. He says that it’s normal for a brother to watch over another brother. Sam says that when you died he felt a hole in his life, like he had lost the only person who’d ever cared about him.”

“I asked him what love is like too.” he says and Dean’s breath hitches in fear, his hands are trembling and his jaw is locked together; no words could escape even if he wanted them to. “He tells me that he felt completely shattered and disenfranchised when Jessica died. That he couldn’t bear a second without her presence. That no matter how made he was at her – even though she always left her clothes everywhere – he eventually grew to enjoy her quirks. That they always forgave each other, even when, if it were everyone else, he’s cut all ties immediately. That’s what love is.”

“The way Sam described a brother to me…” he gulps, “I see Sam that way. With you… I don’t.”

Dean exhales sharply, it’s even worse than he thoughts, “You don’t feel like I’m your brother.”

“I never have.”

Well that’s as good as a kick to the balls.

“Good for you Cass.” He snaps bitterly, “For finally figuring that out.”

“You – you’re angry.” He observes. “This was a mistake.”

“You’re damn right it was.” He mutters, wrapping his arms around himself. “What am I to you then?” he barks; loudly this time.

“It’s ineffable Dean.” He takes a step forward, “Too profound to be put into words.”

Bullshit.

He’d always known that Cass would never see him that way… but at least they could be brothers… friends. That had been a delusion too.

“Great.” He hisses, “Now you’re not confused. Just get out of my face.”

“But I’m still confused Dean.” He snaps back, almost angrily, “How could you call me your brother when you look at me like that?”

Dean feels himself shrink back. This can’t be happening. He’d gotten away with it for so long. Now it’s time to pay the piper.

“How could you call me buddy when you forgive me – no matter what!” He grabs Dean’s collar, shaking him, “You forgive me beyond reason and logic and I can’t… understand why.”

Dean smiles wryly, “I’m pretty sure you understand why Cass.”

“I do.” He says, “You would do anything for me. Just as I would for you – no matter how many times you sacrifice yourself or keep secrets.”

“In all the movies I’ve seen, mixtapes are used a romantic gesture. To woo someone.” Dean stands there speechless as Cass pulls something small from his trench coat. “Here.” He holds the small black cuboid out to Dean. Closer inspection tells him that it’s a mixtape. “A reply. To your tape.”

“What’s happening.” He finds himself asking, “Now I’m the one who is confused.”

Cass smiles softly, “There’s nothing to be confused about. Let’s listen to the song Dean.”

Giving Cass one last glance he places the tape into his cassette player. His fingers tremble so much that it barely makes it in.

What is he going to hear? He can already feel the cracks forming in his heart. This song could shatter it all. Cass looks so hopeful though, an unlikely combination of eagerness and terror is painted across his features. Fine. Dean presses play.

_(I'm an angel with a shotgun, shotgun, shotgun  
An angel with a shotgun, shotgun, shotgun)_

His eyes dart over to Cass immediately. They hold each other’s gaze.

 _Get out your guns, battles begun_  
Are you a saint, or a sinner?  
If loves a fight, than I shall die  
With my heart on a trigger

His heart?

_They say before you start a war  
You better know what you're fighting for_

Cass grabs a hold of his hand then. And it becomes crystal clear to Dean what’s happening. What’s **finally** happening. He holds on with all his might even as the words of the song wash over him.

 __  
Well baby, you are all that I adore  
If love is what you need, a soldier I will be

 _I'm an angel with a shotgun_  
Fighting til' the wars won  
I don't care if heaven won't take me back  
I'll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe  
Don't you know you're everything I have?  
And I, wanna live, not just survive, tonight

“Dean. Can you say something?” Castiel’s voice breaks him from his reverie, “It took every ounce of courage I had to approach you with this. I – know I took a risk but…”

“Why?” Dean whispers, close to tears. He can tell how much effort Cass had put into this. How the song is perfectly suited for the situation down to the very last word. Battles. Knowing what you’re fighting for. Giving up everything. Wanting more than just to survive.

“Because I love you, and it’s occurred to me that you love me too.” Cass says it so easily that Dean wonders why he’d even bothered to freak out earlier.

“Of course I love you.”

“And now you know where I stand… that I love you back.”

Dean smiles, “I’m glad you took the risk then.” He flicks a strand of Cass’ hair, “In fact, I think you deserve a reward.”

Kissing Cass is surreal, he suddenly understands what Cass meant when he called their bond ineffable… profound. And he wouldn’t have it any other way.


End file.
